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It's OK That You're Not OK

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Description

As seen in THE NEW YORK TIMES • READER'S DIGEST • SPIRITUALITY & HEALTH • HUFFPOST Featured on NPR's RADIO TIMES and WISCONSIN PUBLIC RADIO When a painful loss or life-shattering event upends your world, here is the first thing to know: there is nothing wrong with grief. “Grief is simply love in its most wild and painful form,” says Megan Devine. “It is a natural and sane response to loss.” So, why does our culture treat grief like a disease to be cured as quickly as possible? In It’s OK That You’re Not OK, Megan Devine offers a profound new approach to both the experience of grief and the way we try to help others who have endured tragedy. Having experienced grief from both sides―as both a therapist and as a woman who witnessed the accidental drowning of her beloved partner―Megan writes with deep insight about the unspoken truths of loss, love, and healing. She debunks the culturally prescribed goal of returning to a normal, “happy” life, replacing it with a far healthier middle path, one that invites us to build a life alongside grief rather than seeking to overcome it. In this compelling and heartful book, you’ll learn: • Why well-meaning advice, therapy, and spiritual wisdom so often end up making it harder for people in grief • How challenging the myths of grief―doing away with stages, timetables, and unrealistic ideals about how grief should unfold―allows us to accept grief as a mystery to be honored instead of a problem to solve • Practical guidance for managing stress, improving sleep, and decreasing anxiety without trying to “fix” your pain • How to help the people you love―with essays to teach us the best skills, checklists, and suggestions for supporting and comforting others through the grieving process Many people who have suffered a loss feel judged, dismissed, and misunderstood by a culture that wants to “solve” grief. Megan writes, “Grief no more needs a solution than love needs a solution.” Through stories, research, life tips, and creative and mindfulness-based practices, she offers a unique guide through an experience we all must face―in our personal lives, in the lives of those we love, and in the wider world. It’s OK That You’re Not OK is a book for grieving people, those who love them, and all those seeking to love themselves―and each other―better. Read more

Publisher ‏ : ‎ Sounds True Adult; 1st edition (October 1, 2017)


Language ‏ : ‎ English


Paperback ‏ : ‎ 280 pages


ISBN-10 ‏ : ‎ 1622039076


ISBN-13 ‏ : ‎ 74


Item Weight ‏ : ‎ 2.31 pounds


Dimensions ‏ : ‎ 5.25 x 0.75 x 8 inches


Best Sellers Rank: #1,118 in Books (See Top 100 in Books) #1 in Coping with Suicide Grief #1 in Sociology of Death (Books) #2 in Love & Loss


#1 in Coping with Suicide Grief:


#1 in Sociology of Death (Books):


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If you place your order now, the estimated arrival date for this product is: Friday, Nov 8

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Top Amazon Reviews


  • A Brilliant Sense of Validation And Help Finding My Way
This book should be an instruction manual for Life, not only losing a loved one! The book feels so accurate in my feelings and experiences. It’s helpful and effective, even encouraging, in gaining understanding and validity, and the ability to move forward successfully. It has been the truest reflection of everything I have felt about my life and every issue I’ve been through. I’ve experienced childhood trauma, medical and emotional difficulties, and multiple family deaths, including the sudden, unexpected loss of my 54 year old husband. I’ve never found the support I truly need from family or friends, and I’ve seen poor therapists until only recently finding, through persistence, someone valid and supportive. What I’ve felt, what I’ve received as ‘support’ from people around me, the results… all of it put me in a terrible place, with me believing so much was my fault, I was a horrible person, and I could never pick up the pieces. But when you can finally feel that you are valid in your feelings and even understand those around you, you can begin to overcome; and even eventually help others overcome in their times of need. A couple times I’ve discussed with my therapist what I’m learning from the book to get her feedback and perspective, which is always positive, and also in hopes she’ll read it because anyone can gain insight from it. Quoted from the book: “Many grieving people feel like they’re on another planet, or wish they could go to one. Somewhere there are others like them. People who understand.” ... show more
Reviewed in the United States on July 3, 2024 by Karen C.

  • Great book on grief
Before reading this, I had much more education and background on grief and grief work than most others. My go to tends to be Rando. That said, I did find the first couple chapters elementary, but the rest of the book was excellent. For anyone without the background I have this book covers much of the basics in an easy to understand and non complicated way and then gets into the good stuff. Devine draws from both research and her own personal experience with grief and shares openly. There are several different journal and/or craft prompts to help readers process grief. This is a gem. ... show more
Reviewed in the United States on April 29, 2024 by JS

  • Incredibly helpful
I’m dealing with the loss of a 23 year marriage and the loss of my beloved house in the process- and this book has been by far the most comforting and validating books I’ve read about grief. Even though it’s written from the perspective of losing someone from death- so much resonated with me!
Reviewed in the United States on June 23, 2024 by Liz

  • One of the best books on grief
An honest book about grief. It’s for people who are living with grief and people who are supporting the grieving. The book talks about grief with deep understanding that it is not a problem to be solved or an illness to be treated. An invaluable tool to help carry the loss.
Reviewed in the United States on July 13, 2024 by Reina

  • Good Advice
Contains writing prompts, stories from grievers, advice for self-care, etc. This might be helpful for those who haven't read hundreds of other grief books as it is realistic and practical.
Reviewed in the United States on February 5, 2024 by Kindle Customer

  • Excellent read...
It felt like I wrote this book myself as the author hit every feeling and emotion I feel/felt. It was a comforting read to realize I am not alone in my grief. I have actually read this book over and over...it's become my solace. This is the only read that has helped me since my husband passed away too young. The part of just not wanting to be here anymore was spot on. I wake up and still do at times just annoyed that I actually woke up. I just don't want to be here anymore. That doesn't mean I want to commit suicide, I just don't want to be here. It was so comforting to read that the author felt the same way. What I have learned in dealing with grief, is that if one has not experienced grief, they just don't get it...they don't realize that your heart actually physically hurts, that grief is exhausting, it sucks the life out of us and we just have to learn to live with it. There is no getting over grief. You will hear things like, "You are stuck in grief!" "You have been grieving too long" "Get over it" or this ridiculous statement that my own Mother told my 11 year old son..."You are not the only one who has lost a parent". People are just so insensitive because they don't know and they should only realize how lucky they are to not be a member of this specialized club. I come back to this book often...when I need to feel not so alone. ... show more
Reviewed in the United States on June 24, 2024 by Patricia D

  • Very good read/listen
This is a very good book depicting how grief is translated in society and the misconceptions that go along with it. LOVE this book- extremely validating and made me realize the disconnect in society and it is OK that we are not OK. Life will not return back to the way it was before the loss happened- no one should ever expect it to. ... show more
Reviewed in the United States on July 5, 2024 by Sarah

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