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In My Dreams I Hold a Knife: A Novel

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Description

An Amazon Best Book of the Month"[A] mordant debut novel....examines what it means to covet the lives of others, no matter the cost."―The New York Times"Tense, twisty, and packed with shocks."―Riley Sager, New York Times bestselling author of Survive The NightSix friends.One college reunion.One unsolved murder.Ten years after graduation, Jessica Miller has planned her triumphant return to her southern, elite Duquette University, down to the envious whispers that are sure to follow in her wake. Everyone is going to see the girl she wants them to see―confident, beautiful, indifferent. Not the girl she was when she left campus, back when Heather Shelby's murder fractured everything, including the tight bond linking the six friends she'd been closest to since freshman year.But not everyone is ready to move on. Not everyone left Duquette ten years ago, and not everyone can let Heather's murder go unsolved. Someone is determined to trap the real killer, to make the guilty pay. When the six friends are reunited, they will be forced to confront what happened that night―and the years' worth of secrets each of them would do anything to keep hidden.Told in racing dual timelines, with a dark campus setting and a darker look at friendship, love, obsession, and ambition, In My Dreams I Hold A Knife is an addictive, propulsive read you won't be able to put down."Beautiful writing, juicy secrets, complex female characters, and drumbeat suspense―what more could you want from a debut thriller?"―Andrea Bartz, author of Reese's Book Club pick We Were Never Here Read more

Publisher ‏ : ‎ Sourcebooks Landmark (April 19, 2022)


Language ‏ : ‎ English


Paperback ‏ : ‎ 336 pages


ISBN-10 ‏ : ‎ 1728243203


ISBN-13 ‏ : ‎ 07


Item Weight ‏ : ‎ 10.7 ounces


Dimensions ‏ : ‎ 5.75 x 1 x 8.5 inches


Best Sellers Rank: #27,832 in Books (See Top 100 in Books) #1,398 in Psychological Thrillers (Books) #1,974 in Literary Fiction (Books) #2,441 in Suspense Thrillers


#1,398 in Psychological Thrillers (Books):


#1,974 in Literary Fiction (Books):


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Top Amazon Reviews

    • Absolutely Enjoyable…
I really enjoyed this book. The last 20% was a little off the rails and far fetched, but the story as a whole was exciting and fun. Jessica is one of the best worst characters ever written. I hated her for every second of this book but man did I want to hear her story. I love a good dual timeline story and this one did a good job of weaving the past with the present to create a seamless read. ... show more
Reviewed in the United States on April 20, 2024 by Jake Hoffman
    • Dark academia meets dangerous obsession
Review Image by Gabrielle Grosbety Gabrielle Grosbety
“My life was a narrative I couldn’t parse, full of conflicting evidence.” For a while, it was quite comforting, perhaps strangely so given the genre, to always have this book to return to to break up what I was otherwise doing, especially amidst finals. I relished in being part of this world that tilted slightly, dangerously, on its axis, drawing suspicion towards every character by the end. With the thought that each was imperfect, damaged, and at most turns messy, but definitely, undeniably, twistingly human. Author Ashley Winstead just does it right. She exacts from each character turmoil and powerfully unearths the shameful, ugly parts that they desperately wish to keep hidden from others. There were also little, surprising undertones of dark humor woven in, which only strengthened the story and made me just unabashedly feel and feel deeply and pensively. “But in a flash, a vision of torn blond hair, sticky and red, matted against white sheets. I shook my head, pushing away the glitch.” Now, for the actual story: Jessica Miller, the narrator, breathlessly, urgently craves perfection, always has since college where she meets and becomes part of the coveted East House Seven, which includes herself, Mint, Caro, Frankie, Coop, Heather, and Jack. With each of her new friends, she feels all at once armed with a different sense of belonging and place, but also views them as prizes to shamelessly show off, her association to them further cementing her level of status and prestige, both of which she is relentlessly, addictively after and always yearning for. However, of all of Jessica’s friends, I had a soft spot for Coop, who was filled with grit, original, no-nonsense, and all about knocking the Greek system and its toxic exclusivity. I loved every inch of him for that. However, regardless of his words of wisdom to Jessica to forget markers of status and focus, instead, on loosening up and enjoying more, she can’t help herself, she is primed, by other factors and most rigorously herself, toward becoming something greater than what she believes she is. “He took my face in his hands and looked me in the eyes. How terrifying, to be truly looked at.” So, regardless of reason, does Jessica’s obsession for perfection eventually go to her head and get the better of her? Do one of her friends have a vengeful, dark side they may be covering up? All these questions barge to the forefront as Heather is brutally murdered and the case eventually goes cold, with evidence, but not enough, pointing to Jack, her college boyfriend, being the main suspect. However, don’t you know, that he must be too simple, the low-hanging fruit for the real perpetrator to frame. Hence in using an effective flashing between present and past approach, Winstead puts all these characters, now called back in modern day for a college reunion, right on center stage, as each feels the heat in new and pressing ways to confess to how they could be related to the crime on that fateful, terrifying night. I loved every minute of this richly fleshed out story as doom and elitism clashed in new and interesting ways that pierced through me and held me captive. ... show more
Reviewed in the United States on May 2, 2022 by Gabrielle Grosbety Gabrielle Grosbety
    • An Okay Thriller
In My Dreams I Hold a Knife was a decent read from start to finish. I was a bit nervous at first because I thought it was going to start off slow, but I was pleasantly surprised. There are things that happen in the beginning that made me intrigued. I was always wanting more. I needed more information in every chapter. Which, in the end, made this a super quick read for me. Jessica is…something else. I didn’t really enjoy her character, but I think that’s how it’s supposed to be. She has all the confidence in the world, but at the same time, she has no confidence at all. She always needed everyone else’s validation and I hated that for her. She was through some things when it came to her father. He wasn’t very supportive and that had a huge impact on how she viewed herself. Honestly though, even though Jessica wasn’t “likeable” I still wanted to learn more about her, and at times, I was rooting for her. The question is…did I make the right decision? Should I support her? You have to read the book to find out. There are so many twists and turns throughout the whole book that you really don’t know who to trust and who to believe. The ending had me absolutely shocked. There was a slight moment that I was right, but then I changed my mind and was like, “No way.” Although I may have thought of the person once, I did not think of the why/how. There’s actually a bit more information once we find out the whodunnit. That information is wild. Even though this book won’t go down as one of my favorites, it was still a good read. You should pick it up because of the many twists and turns and how it continuously keeps you on your toes. ... show more
Reviewed in the United States on June 16, 2023 by Erica Miller
    • In My Dreams I Hold a Knife by Ashley Winstead 4.5/ 5 ⭐️
Review Image by Nicole M Whisner Nicole M Whisner
In My Dreams I Hold a Knife by Ashley Winstead 4.5/ 5 ⭐️ It has been ten years since they stood on campus. Ten years since they were together as the East House Seven. Ten years since Heather’s murder stained their college years. Now at Duquette University Reunion Weekend, they are together again but still haunted by the events of that toxic night. Jessica Miller is finally going to prove everyone wrong and show them the confident, successful woman she has become. Ten years ago, she lost everything including her one true love because of Heather. Her plan backfired when the reunion turns dark and fatal. Even though Jessica has moved on, not everyone else has. Secrets and memories of that deadly night surface and one person is determined to find the real killer and make them pay. WOW! This book was a wild ride of characters, flashbacks, and hidden truths. The alternating timeline between then and now was beautifully choreographed. There are a lot of characters to comprehend in the beginning, but the characters drove this book. Each and every character is deceitful and shady. I’ll be honest, I thought I had figured the whole mystery out and was a little disappointed 75% into the book. At this point, I got annoyed with the main character, Jessica. Then another flashback revealed a notable twist and left me baffled until the ending. ... show more
Reviewed in the United States on July 30, 2023 by Nicole M Whisner Nicole M Whisner
    • FANTASTIC READ
The way this book was written…excellent…it flowed so smoothly and never felt like I was missing anything, the ending was exactly how I wanted it to be lol..Fantastic book!!!!
Reviewed in the United States on July 31, 2024 by Charlene Aurelius
    • Six friends. One college reunion. One unsolved murder.
4.5/5⭐️'s... Told in dual timelines, this was a good mystery/thriller. It took me a few chapters to get into it but once I started, I couldn't stop! It ended up being quick and fast paced after the initial few chapters. Secrets. Betrayal. Love triangles. Murder... The character development was excellent ... show more
Reviewed in the United States on May 22, 2024 by AFrench

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